Am I sad about it? Not really.
Priorities have been all switched up.
Parenting is a balancing act. Trying to accomplish everything on the to-do list isn't so much a top priority when you have a newborn. I mean, yes, I still do our laundry and vacuum. I haven't given up basic responsibilities, but I don't get upset when I can't get to a task right away.
Since we didn't know Cecilia was going to be a girl, I didn't make any cute girly things for her. I started making a Pinterest board of baby things to make before I was even pregnant. (I did crochet a cardigan, but my gauge was way off and so it won't fit her until she's in preschool. And I crocheted a pair of baby loafers and booties- gender neutral, just to be safe.) I borrowed a dress pattern from my mother-in-law and have had the pieces cut out for about... two weeks. Good night. It's not even a hard pattern. I've made it a couple times already for friends' babies. When I get around to my "normal" tasks like dishes and laundry, there isn't much time for sewing.
Another thing that I haven't made time for is working out. I remember feeling large and in charge and looking forward to being able to do regular workouts with higher intensity. I'm only five weeks out from my delivery, so it's still early. But I'm going to be honest with you-- my recovery was pretty quick, as in, I felt pretty much 100%-back-to-normal after two weeks. In my defense, I am still adjusting to my new sleep schedule or lack there of. Getting up early to workout when I've only gotten a few hours of sleep isn't real appetizing. I would rather sleep in a little bit more and eat a donut. That sounds good to me. Getting up in the middle of the night isn't my favorite, but when I sit down to nurse Cecilia, my selfishness fades away and I only see her. A minute before, she was crying and so upset, and then as she eats, her eyes close and she cuddles up close to me. She is at peace. She is content.
When she's done and smiles in her sleep, that right there makes it all worth it.
Last night when she fell asleep as I tried to burp her on my shoulder, her little mouth was slightly open. Her little bottom lip hung out as she snored quietly, it was perfect.
It's funny to think about what life will be with a baby when you don't have kids yet. People say, "What did I do before my baby? I don't even remember!" Pssh, of course I remember. I used to only do things for my husband and I. There was only the two of us. Now, in this stage of life, there's a newborn that needs constant attention. It won't always be this way. Someday, our little one will be more independent and won't want to cuddle or be soothed.
Babies are only little for a short while. I will get back to sewing and crocheting.
(Well, I hope I can get this dress sewn, so Cecilia can wear it...) There's always naptime. How do you think I had time to write this? <3
